Blessed Birthday to Me

Diary of a SAHM – Day 451

Happy Birthday from Google

Today is my Birthday – a good time to do some reflecting and goal setting. Looking back over the past 30 years (ops.. did I just reveal my age?!), I have been to various places, met countless wonderful people and experienced many ups and downs in life – and for all that, I am thankful~

So now, at 31, I am a stay-at-home mother with a two-year-old son. Is that where I have envisioned myself to be? Hmm… not really. I’d love to have a successful and fulfilling career but things didn’t work out for me in the school. For years I struggled, but in the end, I caved in and chose the easy way out – I quit my job! Till today, I get emotional from time to time about the fact that I do not have a career, especially when I see my peers and juniors soaring in theirs. So yeah, that’s my greatest regret and failure.

On a brighter note, I’m beginning to enjoy being a full-time SAHM and see it as a PRIVILEGE instead. As a SAHM, I am spared from work-related stress. I get to spend more quality time with Joshayne, playing with him and teaching him about the world. It is such a joy to share his a-ha moments when he discovers something new or masters a new skill. It feels great to be the one who understands him the most – knowing his likes and dislikes, being able to interpret his utterances and anticipate or predict his very next move. Secondly, it is a joy to be able to cook for my family and to keep the house in order. Weird as it may sound, I actually enjoy doing household chores. I find great satisfaction in that. All things considered, I think I would still take this path if I were to choose again. I am blessed to have a supportive husband who allows me this privilege and for that I am thankful.

I remember a conversation I once had with Jo, a close friend of mine, when we were only seventeen or eighteen.  I told him then that my ambition was to be a housewife with a PhD. So I guess, I’m halfway to achieving my dream.

So where am I now and where am I headed to?

In my first 30 years, I fell in love with Kiate, got married and gave birth to Joshayne. In my next 30 years, I hope to walk hand in hand with Kiate as we grow old together and to create many more beautiful memories as a family. In my next 3o years, I want to see Joshayne growing up in the knowledge and grace of Christ.

In my first 30 years, I graduated with a bachelor’s degree in TESL and a master’s degree in Measurement and Evaluation. In my next 30 years, I want to pursue and earn a PhD!

In my first 30 years, I was a student, then a teacher and then a wife and mother. In my next 30 years, I want to be a better wife and mother. And one day, if I can have my own career, I want to be a professional consultant and to have my own education centre.

In my first 30 years, I found my faith in Christ; I’ve had mountain-top experiences and also stumbled through the valley of darkness. In my next 30 years, I pray that I can grow stronger and be more mature in my Christian faith. I pray that I can have a more personal relationship with God so that I can serve Him more effectively and be a testimony of His goodness and faithfulness.

In my first 30 years, I have been to Singapore, Thailand, China, Hong Kong, Taiwan, Macau, New Zealand and Australia. In my next 30 years, I wish to tour Europe and visit Japan, Korea, Vietnam, Maldives, Greece, …. in fact it would be awesome if I can travel to ALL the countries in the world.

As for short-term goals (in no particular order)…

  • I want to take good care of my family  – provide decent meals, keep the house clean and presentable, etc.
  • Study and document Joshayne’s development, especially his language development.
  • Take up relevant online courses.
  • Improve my Chinese language proficiency, especially in reading and Chinese vocabulary (so that I can teach Joshayne).
  • Read and write@blog for personal and professional development.
  • Try my best to contribute financially by giving tuition, taking up editing jobs etc.
  • Design at least one photobook per year for Joshayne.
  • To invest into the lives of others as much as possible.

Proverbs 16:9 says, “A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.” May God’s grace and mercy be upon me. I surrender my next 30 years unto the Lord; may He direct my steps~


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